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Epiphany's world renowned usher corps has witnessed a year of growth and change. The usual high level of seamless service resulted in our third successive Bishop's Award trophy. Two rookies made the cut this year, Joyce Calhoun and Elaine Matterson, and we welcomed back experienced ushers Cecilia Okoye and Horace May. As always, several moved on to new challenges, and they will be missed. Isaac Netty moved to Ohio to get off the team, while Jules and Lisa Loth left for Austin. L.C. Mitchell wants us to believe he has retired, having received the Meritorious Service Award. |
| For safety reasons and unbeknownst to the Vestry, our generous annual travel budget was redirected to properly finance the little known yet historically significant Usher Coordinator Coronation Ceremony and Usher Appreciation Dinner. The ceremony, little known even among religious scholars, dates back to 1306 when King Edward I created the exalted position of Usher Coordinator. The king was acutely aware of the political and economic importance of the Ushers who have always had their fingers on the pulse, if not the pockets, of the realm.
While the duties of Usher Coordinator have remained rather sketchy, the power of the Usher Coordinator has never been challenged. He has always had the best horses, rarest jewels, and the most beautiful women. While over the ages, there has always been some question as to the alms collected, there has been no proof of any wrongdoing or answer to the question of why the Usher Coordinator always had the best horses, rarest jewels, and of course, the most beautiful women. The moving Coronation Ceremony included the passing of the cape, crown, and staff from Dave Anthony to Woody Ledenham, the new Coordinator. Father Jim also presented the rose-colored glasses, pirate's eye patch, Mardi Gras beads, and "Peace" headband to Woody with the appropriate admonishments. Following the toast to Woody, the festive dinner was enjoyed by all. Merlyn Osbourne was clearly the best dressed in his tuxedo, and Woody's suede Doc Marten platform boots kept him from tripping on his royal cape. Monroe Woodum's "Love Me Tender" Elvis impersonation was inspirational, and Diane Beach's conga line behind the waterfall was fun for all. Realizing the value of fiber, Bob Okpara bypassed the Jell-O shots in favor of his own Metamucil shots. Back by popular demand, Al Molison's "Island Fever" steel band ignited the limbo contest as Barbara Taylor nosed out Bonnie O'Shea to take the title. The highlight of the evening may have been Terry Waddell's spontaneous karaoke rendition of "Stop...In the Name of Love." The fully choreographed backup by Mercy Akron, Yvonne Rager, and Obi "Wan Kenobi" Osuagwu brought everyone to their feet. Graciously offering to valet for the evening, Father Bruce brought the limousine around, and Woody and Susan drove off to the cheers of the excited crowd. Service was once again the cornerstone for the Ushers this year. Ever vigilant, Murriete Williams and Dorothy Andrews finally realized that the signs diagramming the church campus were all upside down, and reinstalled them right side up. Betty Goolsby's new book, Ushering - Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, has saved many a compulsive usher this year. Thanks to Joyce Calhoun for the new "We Take Euros" sign in the narthex, and the EYC thanks Elaine Matterson for the used ATM machine in the youth building. For those who appreciate service, fellowship, and double-digit annual raises, but do not like elections or meetings, we invite you to join us. As we continue our lobby for Usher Appreciation Sunday, we look forward to a new year of serving with humility and pride. Let's roll! Respectfully submitted. Woody Ledenham - Usher Coordinator Dave Anthony - Usher Coordinator Emeritus Note: We hope to add pictures soon of the Coronation Ceremony! Please click on the links below to read previous reports of the illustrious and well-travelled Epiphany Ushers. 1997 Ushers Annual Report 1998 Ushers Annual Report |
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